Life Sucks

Life has been a real bitch.And Runaway Bride has lost it all.Her life sucks and it sucks real bad. A new loser comes, every now and then,to take a look at yours truly. Same old story, every damn weekend. Am I fed up, or what? No, it is just the beginning sweetheart, you have a long way to go...:@

Can't find peace at home, or anywhere else.Where ever I go, those profiles follow.And some of the losers have enough courage to hunt me down at Facebook and send me their friend requests full of shit.Runaway Bride has lost all hope that there is a Mr Right for her.All she finds are strangers who are so strange that she thinks they have landed from some other planet.There are a few incidents which need to be mentioned here, but some other time. I just want to rant today. No stories, just plain old cribbing for now.

It is a strange feeling when anyone and everyone around you is getting married.And it gets even worse when 'anyone and everyone' incudes ALL of your best buddies.You fear a void, a strange kind of emptiness that would suddenly envelope you from all sides.One fine Sturday morning, you get up and realise that there is no one who can make you feel better, no one to go shopping with, no one to catch a movie with, no one for the silly girl talk, no one for having a cup of coffee or lunch with,no one to help you with things...Suddenly, you feel so lonely in your own city.You don't have anyone for company, and weekend starts to suck.

And with a big bang, you realise that you are still single.And lonely.A bit too lonely.And not even shopping can take your mind of that deadly realisation.In a flash, the world around you changes.Everything is getting worse.You meet random guys because your parents are after your life.And they put you off.With a realisation of being the lonely soul that you are,on one hand , to meeting those guys( who you don't wanna meet coz they don't fit into your damn criterion), you keep on thinking what is going wrong with you...What is the bigger mess which you must clear first.And then it is a vicious circle of mess and only mess around.

Runaway Bride cried like anything today.And yesterday.And day before.She was sad.She still is.She has forgotten how to be happy.The smile she has to pose sometimes, is a fake one.

Two Stories

It has been really really long since I updated this space here. I was buzy relocating, switching jobs, finding a house, settling down, switching jobs again!!! There was a period of lull in the 'munda-hunt', but those golden days flew away so fast that I realised that I had, had a break, only when it was over:(

Anyways, then Mr H came into picture.Mr H - Nice guy, perfect son,perfect- brother and would have been a perfect hubby too.It was nice talking to him, but yours truly was not in a state of mind to be the ultimate 'bahu' that his family was looking for. Mr H was one of those people who had struggled a lot, in life and now,he wanted life to be perfect.I called him a self-made-man!I had a strange kind of respect for this man, but somehow, I was not ready to make ultimate sacrifice which was,not a distant demand, but a close reality in his life , as I saw it.

I was not looking for excuses to turn him down, but I too want my life to be good,if not perfect.And the visions I get, of myself as a married woman, were not too close to what my life would have been, If I chose to take the thing with Mr H further.

I wish Mr H, a nice life ahead and hope he finds what he is looking for. Mr H, it was nice talking to you.

 

Also, I met Mr K. It was a strange co-incidence.While going back to Delhi, I met our common friend in the train, who kept on telling me that one of her friends would be joining her in sometime. And yours truly got the ultimate shock to see, Mr K.It was very uncomfortable. The three of us had to do some really silly talk before dozing off to sleep. And as always, cribbing about our jobs was the best topic anyone could have started to avoid any ackward conversation, or to break the ice(whatever it was)


But, how could have Murphy spared me.When something goes wrong, everything else, is waiting to go wrong.My train got late and we had to spend another few hours together, than expected:( I have never felt so uncomfortable before - I had literally spent the night in an arm's distance from a guy, I rejected coz his parents wouldn't let me work.Life's a strange bitch!